Chapter 51

This was enough. I had filled my quota of crap for one day and could not take any more. If it wasn’t for my mother, I’d be packing my things in the old Ranger and heading back to Tulsa.

I actually didn’t have a job and the Review was draining my funds faster than a divorce judge, but this was more than I bargained for.

It was bad enough getting shot at, having M.J. kidnapped and them threatening to slice my mother, but after seeing this, I knew there were two choices: either throw in the towel or come out swinging.

The man’s white truck was parked close to my Ranger. It shouldn’t be here. I remembered thinking that the man must have some more information to pass on. But when I saw the door cracked open, it hit me that something was wrong.

I didn’t want to open the door. It was almost like watching a horror movie and wanting to hide your eyes, but keeping them open anyway. As I opened the door, the man was staring toward me. Those eyes that were so intimidating earlier no longer had the same effect.

The man’s mouth was open, but would never pass along any more information. His white shirt was now a deep crimson color in the front. I could handle all this. But when I saw the knife sticking out of his neck, well, that was too much.

I started backing up, tripped and fell. As soon as I hit, I continued scooting back, screaming loud enough to wake the whole town. I didn’t stop until my back hit the side of my truck. The man’s lifeless eyes never left me. The bad guys obviously didn’t want him telling me anything else, that’s for sure.

My cell phone was missing in action so I got up and ran into the Review building to call the authorities. I turned on every light in the place and locked the door. The front door was now a piece of plywood. It made me feel like a hurricane was coming. Actually, I decided a hurricane had already hit my once peaceful life.

I called 911, the local police and Nancy. The sirens started coming my way again. This time, there was no joy. Yes, this would all sell newspapers, but it wasn’t worth it if people were dying.

People did not die like this in Langford. They might have wrecks and illnesses, but seldom do people find their life ended with a bullet to the head or a knife to the throat.

Chief Arnold was the first to arrive. He looked terrible. Our chief had obviously been in bed when the call came, but you had to give him credit, he beat all the officers on duty. He was wearing a white tee-shirt that looked like moths had attacked. His right nipple peeked through one of the holes.

His jeans were too small, barely reaching his hips. The chief’s belly prevented the pants from coming any closer to his head. The aforementioned belly was testing the strength of the fabrics in the tee-shirt. He had grabbed his gun and was waving it around while approaching me. Chief Arnold had failed to put on a hat and was suffering a serious case of bed head.

He had parked his car next to my mother’s. I walked out to meet him in the parking lot. Chief Arnold was staring at my mother’s car.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

“Nothing, I just like that car!” he said. “Is that your mother’s car?”

I nodded and started walking toward the truck. He failed to follow.

“I’ve always wanted a car like that. How’s the ride?”

“Fairly smooth, I guess. Shouldn’t you be checking out the guy in the truck?”

“Why? He ain’t goin nowhere!” The chief laughed after saying that. It was true, the man wasn’t going anywhere. But I failed to find any humor in the situation.

I had watched enough television to know you didn’t do anything around a crime scene that could damage any evidence, so I stood way away. Plus, if I stood over here, the man’s eyes weren’t on me.

Nancy was the next person to arrive. She parked down the alley and emerged, looking none the worse for wear. Even in the middle of the night, her hair stood high and proud. You could tell she was tired, but not her hair! She was wearing some frilly white shirt, jeans that were a little on the tight side and tennis shoes. I watched her start running toward me with a little unease. About halfway to me, she spread out her arms, like she was coming to hold me.

“Ugh,” I said, right before she tripped over a rock. Her landing zone was a mud puddle approximately the size of my truck. Nancy fell in slow motion, her arms waving like she was trying to take flight. A person cannot take flight without the aid of a pilot, however, and she fell right in the puddle.

“Tee hee!” Chief Arnold laughed. He cut it short after I gave him a dirty look.

Nancy had dressed like she was going on a date. I had no idea how she could get ready so quick. I figured her hair took at least an hour.

The other police officer on duty arrived and had to slam on his brakes to avoid running over Nancy in the mud puddle. I walked to the edge of the puddle and held out my hand to help her. She either looked like a crying fit was in order or a breakdown.

She was on her knees, looking up at me like a young child does to their parent after falling and skinning their knee.

“It’s okay,” I said.

“I fell in the mud puddle!” she told me. Oh really? Is that why you’re on your knees in the middle of a mud puddle, covered with mud and water?

“Here, let me help.”

Instead of taking my hand, she reached up to feel her head.

“How’s my hair?” she asked.

“It’s fine. Not one out of place.”

She breathed a sigh of relief. Everything could be in total chaos, but as long as Nancy felt good about her hair, life was okay.

Chief Arnold and his officer were both admiring my mother’s car. The dead body was garnering less attention than the boat of a car that my mother drives. I helped Nancy out of the puddle and we walked over next to where our authorities were visiting.

“I bet you could stash about ten Hispanics in there,” the officer mentioned.

“Yep, and never even use the trunk,” Chief Arnold added.

“Aren’t you guys going to check on the dead guy?” I asked.

“We’ll get to it. No rush, right?”

“What are you waiting on?”

“I just ate,” Chief Arnold added. “I don’t wanna lose it.”

Some cars were starting to drive by again. But it failed to excite me. The sheriff showed up, looking the same as he had earlier in the evening. He pulled in behind the dead guy’s truck and got out of his car.

I walked over to meet him. Surely, he had more interest in a dead person than the chief did.

“Who’s car?” he asked.

“It’s my mother’s.”

“Nice!” The sheriff was walking toward the truck, at least. I didn’t mind the compliments, just as long as they did their duty.

“I’m glad you’re here,” I added. “Chief Arnold wasn’t very interested in inspecting the crime scene.”

“He doesn’t like to see dead bodies.”

Neither did I. The sheriff snapped on some gloves as he arrived at the truck. He opened the door and started looking around. The sheriff was smart enough not to touch anything. I told him everything that had happened since we last met, including the part about the people killing my father and almost running me over.

The sheriff wouldn’t comment. It was like we were talking about the weather instead of dead bodies and threats.

“Did he give you any names?” the sheriff asked.

“No, he wouldn’t even tell me his name.”

“His name is Orville Lane.”

The name meant nothing to me. The sheriff told me what he knew about the dead guy. Orville owned a large spread out near the Big Creek community. He was retired military and now spent his time buying and selling cattle, along with snooping in other people’s business.

“He called me all the time to tell me about some conspiracy theory,” the sheriff said. “Orville’s elevator couldn’t quite make it all the way to the top floor.”

That would explain a lot of things, if Orville was relaying his thoughts and suspicions instead of the facts. But the man I talked with earlier did not seem like the same one the sheriff described.

Nancy was following me around like a lost puppy. Everywhere I went, she was there. It was almost like I had told her to heel and she obeyed. The evening was a little cool and the water from the mud puddle only made it worse. It was fairly obvious that Nancy either failed to wear a bra or had a thin one on.

“Please go inside and make some coffee,” I said. She was distracting all the law enforcement of LeFlore County.

After she went inside, Chief Arnold came over.

“Didja see them bullets!” he stated. “Looked like .38’s!”

I ignored him, as much as possible.

“Say, you hitting that?” Chief Arnold asked. “From what I understand, that’s some Grade A material!”

“No, I’m not,” I fired back. This was the guy who was supposed to protect us?

“Man, if I were you, I’d be crawling all over that!”

“Yeah, and if I were you, I’d be over at the crime scene.”

He grumbled something and walked away. It was obvious the police chief would rather talk about Nancy instead of the dead guy.

After a few minutes, Nancy returned, carrying a cup of coffee. She had put on a jacket before coming back outside. You could see the disappointment from all the guys. Chief Arnold actually shook his head.

“How come they look disappointed?” Nancy asked.

“I don’t know. Why don’t you ask them?”

“Okay!” She started to walk away.

“I was kidding.”

“Oh really? I must have missed the humor?”

Yeah, so did I. She stood beside me the whole time, offering to get this or do this every couple of minutes. Nancy had obviously never been married.

She kept edging closer every time I looked away. I would wait a minute and slide over. She about had me cornered against the building when Chili Dog’s truck came barreling down the alley, scattering all the cops.

This was not a good time for Squiggy and Mule. There were cops everywhere and I had a pretty good idea they were probably on the verge of passing out. They climbed out of the truck and started staggering toward me. Trailing behind them were two of the ugliest creatures I have ever seen. They were bad enough that you could have a horror movie and just show them and it would have people screaming.

They were both smoking cigarettes. I wasn’t positive, but it looked like personal hygiene was not something they spent a lot of time worrying about.

“Y’all havin a party and not invite the Squigster?” Squiggy hollered. A television crew out of Fort Smith had arrived and was filming Squiggy. The law enforcement guys were not happy like they were prior to Nancy putting on a jacket.

Mule walked over and leaned against the wall. He had some serious drool problems. Mule saw Nancy and moved closer to her.

“Yer purdy!” he said.

Nancy was embarrassed. She ducked her head, but I could see the smile. “Thank you.”

Mule held out his huge hand to shake. “I’m Mule!”

“I know who you are.”

Squiggy and Mule’s dates arrived.

“Is that a stiffy?” the brunette asked. I realized they were twins with some disgust.

“Who has a stiffy?” the blonde asked. She almost acted frantic. They had different hair colors and clothing, but otherwise, they were identically ugly.

The brunette shoved her sister. “Not that kind. There’s a dead guy!”

“Oh,” the other one said, looking almost as disappointed as the cops were after Nancy covered herself up. She saw me and brightened up. “What’s your name?”

“J. Edgar Hoover,” I said. The two girls nodded. Squiggy and Mule were a little confused.

“I thought it was Mike Hunt?” Mule asked. Squiggy nodded in agreement.

“You have a what?” the blonde asked.

Nancy got closer. It was almost like she was afraid the ugly chicks were going to make a move on me. The twins realized that I wasn’t interested. If they were offended, they didn’t show it. I figured they were used to it by now.

“Ain’t yer name Nancy?” Mule asked.

Nancy nodded and was almost climbing on my back.

“Ya know why dey call me de ‘Mule’?”

“I’ve heard,” Nancy said.

“Why?” the blonde asked. She perked up right quickly.

“Yeah, why?” the other asked.

Mule ignored them, which I was thankful to see. Squiggy whispered something in the brunette’s ear.

“Wow!” she said. “This must be our lucky night. I guess both of you are that way!”

“Naw, Squiggy’s wearin a sock,” Mule said, before he could catch himself. He realized what had just left his lips and slowly turned to see Squiggy’s reaction.

Squiggy was furious. How dare his friend reveal that information!

“That just ain’t right!” the blonde stated. Both the girls moved closer to Mule.

“You need help!” the brunette added.

Squiggy actually looked a little hurt.

“Yeah, and youse chicks are uglier’n my dog’s rear,” he said.

Chief Arnold walked over to say hello. As he approached, I saw Squiggy start to smile.

“Hey, Chief,” Squiggy said. “You know what’s worse’n a hurrycane?”

Chief Arnold pondered the question for a few seconds. “A typhoon?”

“Naw, it’s a titty twister!” he grabbed the police chief’s exposed nipple and gave it a good yank. Chief Arnold yelped like a dog.

“Quit it, Squiggy!” he hollered. “I have sensitive nipples!”

I started sneaking away, as did Nancy. She was so close I couldn’t move without bumping into her. Squiggy finally let go of Chief Arnold, who was now doubled over in pain. The two chicks were rolling them a smoke out of a can of Bugler. I started walking around, trying to get some room between myself and Nancy.

“You’re kinda hyper!” Nancy said. “I like that in a man!”

If she heard my groan, Nancy did not reveal it. The crime scene started to disperse. They hauled the body and the truck off. The police and county guys filtered out, leaving just the six of us.

“Bout time!” Squiggy said. He was standing off by himself. The twins were trying to interest Mule in them. He appeared to be sobering up. “Anybody got beer?”

Nobody had beer! Squiggy looked devastated.

I walked over to Squiggy and gave him some money. He brightened up for a minute.

“Why are you with them, Squiggy?” I asked.

“Dey kept buyin us beer!”

“Hey, you got a toilet?” the blonde asked.

“Yes, I do.”

They staggered them for a second.

“Can we use it?”

Nancy looked as horrified as I felt. Who knows what they were carrying?

“It’s inside,” I said. After they walked off, I turned to Nancy. “Remind me to disinfect the bathroom in the morning.”

She smiled and nodded. “Look!”

I turned and saw Mule and Squiggy climbing in the truck and watched them drive off. Somehow, I didn’t expect them to be back. The twins came back outside a few minutes later. It looked like they had worked on their hair, not that it helped their appearance.

“Where’d they go?” the blonde asked.

“I think they left,” I said.

“Dem pigs!” her sister said.

They started walking away. The blonde stopped and turned around.

“You need to call a plumber,” she said. “I couldn’t get it to flush down the stool.”

Nancy was yawning every few seconds. She seemed to realize this was not a good time. I looked at my watch and saw it was almost four in the morning.

“You better get home and get some sleep,” I said.

“I can stay with you,” she offered.

“Naw, go home and get some sleep.”

She nodded and smiled. Nancy leaned over and kissed me on the cheek.

“You’re a nice guy, Michael Hunt,” she said and started walking toward her car.

“Thank you.”

She nodded and drove off, leaving me alone. I had not slept in almost twenty four hours, but did not care. It was time to break out the old shovel and do a little digging. My father had found something out about these guys and I was determined to find it.

The bad guys seemed to have plenty of weapons. Now, it was time to find something I could use to fight back with, knowing that might be the only thing that would get me out of here alive.

Chapter 52